Go nuts over Krispy Kreme donuts
"Donut buy!"Okay, that was a lame title, don't you agree? Well fuck you if you do. Anyway, when I got to the office a while ago (late as usual), I saw boxes upon boxes of Krispy Kreme donuts—okay, doughnuts—saying "hi" and "eat me" to me. Turned out the Philippine franchise gave our department like over 20 boxes of sample doughnuts (prototypes, if you will) just because we're cute, suckers for freebies, hardworking (though always late for work), suckers for freebies, obnoxious, suckers for freebies, think we're better than everyone else, suckers for freebies, the best, and overall, we rock their world. And suckers for freebies.
I had to try really damn hard to feign disinterest towards those fattening rolls of sugar and carbs. But when someone offered me a piece, I of course didn't want to be rude and turn her down. However, because I didn't want to look like a pathetic hungry skinny hog, I had to try to sound intelligent by saying stuff like, "I didn't know they'll be open till November 30 in The Fort and December 1 in SM Megamall!" But because I was eating with such gusto, it sounded more like, "Mahmeemeemow nelmeemoomen chil momemer mirmy in mamort em mememer mon in m m memamall!" The first doughnut was gone by the second syllable of "memamall." Then she explained that we got samples because we're just cool like that.
The glazed doughnut wasn't bad at all. It was fucking fattening good. If there was any bread softer in the world, it would be a pandesal dipped in Blend 45 coffee—for like three days. Sorry Go Nuts Donuts, but it seems Momemer Mirmy will be the day of reckoning. And Hot Loops, well, it seems you really are the only thing in the doughnut universe that gives people headaches from all your sugar (and because of you, I didn't know MSG could be so sweet). But hey, don't expect too much—and go on saying that Krispy Kreme is soooo overrated thanks to smart asses like Miss Diss. It's just, well, nice, soft, and different.
And 30 fucking pesos per piece. I ended up eating P120 worth of flour, sugar, and carbs just because I knew they were worth P120.
I had to try really damn hard to feign disinterest towards those fattening rolls of sugar and carbs. But when someone offered me a piece, I of course didn't want to be rude and turn her down. However, because I didn't want to look like a pathetic hungry skinny hog, I had to try to sound intelligent by saying stuff like, "I didn't know they'll be open till November 30 in The Fort and December 1 in SM Megamall!" But because I was eating with such gusto, it sounded more like, "Mahmeemeemow nelmeemoomen chil momemer mirmy in mamort em mememer mon in m m memamall!" The first doughnut was gone by the second syllable of "memamall." Then she explained that we got samples because we're just cool like that.
The glazed doughnut wasn't bad at all. It was fucking fattening good. If there was any bread softer in the world, it would be a pandesal dipped in Blend 45 coffee—for like three days. Sorry Go Nuts Donuts, but it seems Momemer Mirmy will be the day of reckoning. And Hot Loops, well, it seems you really are the only thing in the doughnut universe that gives people headaches from all your sugar (and because of you, I didn't know MSG could be so sweet). But hey, don't expect too much—and go on saying that Krispy Kreme is soooo overrated thanks to smart asses like Miss Diss. It's just, well, nice, soft, and different.
And 30 fucking pesos per piece. I ended up eating P120 worth of flour, sugar, and carbs just because I knew they were worth P120.
2 comments:
America's Number One Cause of Obesity...is now in Manila!
W00t!
I sure can't wait until I stuff my arteries!
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