Echo tries to make music

This is old news, but I just want to remind everyone that Jericho Rosales is in a band. With an album. I'd like to say that Jeans, Echo's (yeah, we're close) band, follows in the pansy footsteps of fellow pogi band Hale, but every time I see Echo's three bandmates and feel no urge whatsoever to throw them against the wall and rip their clothes off (and the thought makes me want to hurl instead), hell no, they're no pogi rock band. In fact, it seems that Eat Bulaga Mr. Pogi himself Echo deliberately picked out three nasty looking dudes to be in his band because humping the life out of Heart Evangelista every freaking day just isn't enough to appease the little insecure part of him (the one that used to be a simple joe who didn't speak in English during interviews, unlike now who's all English-spokening and an artiste at that).


What the hell was EMI Philippines thinking signing up these clowns into a stable of artists that include Bamboo, Sugarfree, The Bloomfields, Urbandub, Hale... er, okay.


Anyway, apparently Mr. Pogi simpleton turned Inglisero-artsy fartsy homeboy wrote all the songs in the album. Maybe trying so fucking hard to comprehend his moneyed girlfriend's English made him believe that he's some rich kid, too, or worse, Shakespeare. And one of the songs he wrote was made into a duet with the girlfriend. Awww. Not. Check out the lyrics:

YOU’RE SO BEAUTIFUL
(Jericho Rosales)

Haaaaaaaa, haaaayayayayy...
Haaaaaaaa, haaaayayayayy...
And I can’t believe I found you
And I can’t believe I’m with you
You’re so beautiful, so beautiful
You’re so beautiful

And I found the right words to say
And I like to feel this way
It’s so beautiful, so beautiful
It’s so beautiful

And I... Hay...
And I... Hay...
I... Hay...
I... Hay...
I... Hay..
Hoooh...2x

(Instrumental)

Hoooh...2x

And I found you
And I love you
And I surrender
I surrender
I love you...
I love you...
I love you...

What the flying fuck is that? He types the word "beautiful" and the phrase "I love you" and copies and pastes it onto practically every line and that's supposed to make him an English-speaking artist-writer-musician? And he thinks breathing out loudly through his mouth is a freaking word that he just has to include it in the lyrics, like over and over again? Excuse me, but if that makes him an English-speaking artist-writer-musician, then I must be a better English-speaking artist-writer-musician!

YOU’RE EFFIN' UGLY
(Miss Diss)

Wooooo, woohoooo...
Wooooo, woohoooo...
I knew I'd find youuuu woooooh
I knew this day would come, yeeeeaaaah
You’re so ugly, so effin' ugly
You’re so effin' ugly
Fugly in short

And I found the right words to say
Because I'm witty this way
It’s so beautiful, so beautiful
It’s so beautiful
But I'm not talking about you
Woooooh...
Because you're fugly
Yiiiiiih...

And I... Hay...
And I... Hay...
I... Hay...
I... Hay...
I... Hay...
Zzzzzzz...
Ngork...
I meant
Hoooh...2x

(Instrumental)

Zzzzzzz...
Ngork...
I meant
Hoooh...2x

And I found you
Because fugliness stands out from the crowd
And I love you
Because you make me look beautiful beside you
And I surrender
I surrender
My backpack at the baggage counter
Because they'll think I'll steal groceries
From the supermarket at Megamall
Like a box of Jar matches, Dragon Katol, and all items SM Bonus
I hate you...
I hate you...
Babayoo...

WTF.